‘MY EX WAS VIOLENT’ LILIAN NG’ANG’A ON SURVIVING AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

Project manager and  Former First Lady of Machakos County Lilian Ng’ang’a, has bravely talked about surviving an abusive relationship with an ex-boyfriend.

Lilian recounted a harrowing incident that took place at Rezorous in Westlands, where her then-boyfriend physically assaulted her. “I remember a time in my life when I had a boyfriend who was violent,” She revealed. “We were at Rezorous in Westlands, hanging out, and he concluded that I was exchanging looks with someone else. He hit me. I was so shocked that I hit him back instantly. I thought, ‘Who the F do you think you are?’”

Despite the violence, Lilian admitted that the relationship continued because they were ‘so in love,’ even though it was so toxic. She shared how the abuse affected her daily life, including having to call in sick from work and lying to her doctor about her injuries. “I told the doctor I fell down the stairs, but she saw through it and said, ‘Girl, you’re lying. Somebody hit you.’”

Looking back, Lilian described the relationship as madness. “At my age now, I will never allow anything close to that to happen. I think we always need to go through that nonsense to ensure it never happens again.”

She also empathises for those currently in abusive relationships, acknowledging how difficult it can be to leave despite advice from friends, family, and colleagues. “I’m just thinking about people who are in the same situation today. Probably your partner is violent and abusive in whatever way, and you have people telling you to leave, but you just can’t. I’m sorry.”

Now Lilian is able to laugh about the experience, “I‘m laughing about it now because it is a distant memory, and there’s no emotion. It is something that happened,” she said.