‘MENTALLY IN SHAMBLES’ PATRICIA KIHORO ON LOSING HER FATHER 

Kenyan actress, singer, and radio presenter Patricia Kihoro has opened up on grief following the death of her father and several close family members. 

The musician reflected on the pain she has experienced since her father passed away 11 weeks ago. “77 days trying to figure out how to exist in a world where Dad doesn’t, I have never known a pain like this, I guess because I will never know a love like his,” she wrote.

She described her father as a friend and confidante,”His love was big, his smile wide, his laughter hilariously infectious. I miss him. So much. He was my friend, confidante, culinary adventure date, drinking buddy, jokester… my dad.”

Kihoro also talked about losing several other family members in recent months. Just two days before her father’s passing, her mother’s best friend, Aunt Josephine, also died unexpectedly. Shortly after, her uncle, Martin, on her mother’s side, passed away as well.

“I was still reeling from Guka’s and Charlie’s deaths in Feb when Dad’s health took a turn for the worse that same month. Hardly processing that grief while facing Dad’s deteriorating health. Mentally, in shambles. Physically, in and out of hospitals for Dad’s multiple stays.Failing at holding my life together as Dad’s body gradually failed him. And then he died, and I came undone.”

She expressed how challenging it was to navigate life while facing multiple losses. “I fell into a state, barely seeing beyond tomorrows. Almost catatonic, steeped in pain. Nothing mattered. Except mum and my brothers. If not for family, my friends, and my psychiatrist, I don’t know,” she admitted.

Patricia’s message ended with a note of hope. “The clouds are parting. The sun is finding me again. This pain though, is a beautiful pain and in some way I don’t ever want it to end. It’s a beautiful reminder of the big, expansive love that I, we, had the privilege of experiencing while they were here. ‘It is said that all that we love is merely loaned to us, and we must not take our companions for granted. We must uphold our side of that ancient bargain.’ Till we meet again. I love you, always“