JANET MBUGUA ON LOSING FRIENDSHIPS AFTER DIVORCE 

Media personality and author Janet Mbugua has peeled back the curtain on an often-overlooked consequence of divorce: the quiet unraveling of friendships. 

Speaking in an interview, the TV personality revealed how marital status becomes an unspoken filter particularly within close-knit communities. “There is a difference in friendship between pre and post divorce. That’s when you really begin to see friendships for what they are. There’s some Christmas parties you’re not invited to, they are just like ‘where’s your plus one?’ But suddenly when you’re no longer plus one, it’s just very quiet, I noticed.“

The mother of two described the peculiar social isolation experienced by divorced women in residential estates, “Another friend of mine who’s gone through it, was like, I thought it was just me. Especially if you live in an estate there’s a weird, almost subconscious profiling.” 

Mbugua recounted reviewing her wedding photos most of her wedding lineup are no longer her friends, “When I think about my wedding lineup now, I realised I’m not even friends with most of them anymore which feels particularly gut-wrenching when I consider how life has unfolded. Only one bridesmaid remained close, and that’s because we grew up together and she’s weathered her own storms.

Another distance herself, it was inexplicable, she literally told me, ‘I’m getting married but you’re not invited.’ Last year, I learned she’d excluded several other friends in the same way. When she reached out two years later with, ‘Hey, should we be friends again?’ I was honestly I’m not ready. I told her there’s too much unresolved pain between us, too many conversations we’ve never had. When I’m ready, I’ll let her know and it’s been two years since that conversation.”